unknownrival | [RL with Birkin.]

Birkin returned the quick hug, letting the grumbling of his stomach answer that question for him. "I'm voting dinner. I haven't eaten in..." He frowns, not actually remembering the exact figure. Hell it could have been days. What day was it even? When was the last time Birkin even fucking showered?

"Yeah, dinner first would be good."

"Dinner it is. Do I need to start sending you meals? Again?"

Honestly, how Birkin survived without him he didn't know.

It really was a mystery for the ages.

"No, no, I'm fine, I just... Got a bit caught up in my work. That's all. I usually do remember these days."

"All right. Let's see, what restaurants are local... I think I passed an Olive Garden, is that all right with you?" Issei wasn't going to stiff him with fast food, but he was still a bit thrifty.

"Italian sounds fantastic. Lead the way."

And Birkin would completely ignore the fact that he typically took people to Italian restaurants when he was on a date with them.

Olive Garden was in short walking distance, the wait was short to nonexistent, and the table they were at wasn't in a loud part of the restaurant.

Issei unfolded his menu and looked over it. "I never know what I want to get... How have you been?"

Birkin mercifully thought to leave the labcoat at home. The blood splatters might have freaked out their waiter a bit.

"Yeah I always have that problem too. And I've been-" Birkin doesn't really want to start going off on his list of problems this early in the evening. "...Good. I've been. Good. How 'bout you? Everything as it should be in paradise?"

Bloodstains on clothing: not socially acceptable in public.

Issei was a little suspicious, but decided against prying. "I'm doing fairly well. Diarmuid's a little depressed over one of his friends leaving the community - he's worried that he'll die due to a future shown, and doesn't think that he should be able to escape his fate when someone else can't."

Sigh. "But other than that I'm good."

Birkin hummed in response to that. "Yeah, it's hard to justify changing the future like that sometimes, but..." He shrugged. "Maybe you can convince him that it's worth changing, for you."

He leaned back and scoffed before letting out a bitter laugh. "Or something equally stupid and sentimental."

"Stupid and sentimental works." Issei shook his head. "I'm glad you're here."

"I'm glad you came back. I was getting pretty lonely all by myself." He smiled, though it doesn't quite reach his eyes, and winked. "And I bet you missed having access too, right?"

"That's right. I missed you - and everyone else, of course. But you more than most people." Honestly, with Shirou less and less a part of his life, he had few better friends than William.

Birkin's smile actually did widen at that, looking a lot more genuine suddenly. Issei, you make this old man's kokoro go dokidoki. "That's sweet of you to say, thanks. I missed you more than most other people I've lost here too."

"Then I just won't allow myself to leave again," Issei answered. "And if I do, you can punish me for it when I get back."

"I get to 'punish' you, huh?"

"...What's that look for?"

Birkin chuckled darkly. "You don't even realize how that sounded do you?"

"What did it sound like?" Issei asked, a bit wary already.

"Never mind. Don't worry about it." And he wouldn't tell, solely because he was having too much fun with this.

"William. Don't just say 'never mind' when you've gotten me started."

Issei was too easy to string along.

"How about 'I'll tell you when you're older'?"

"I'm twenty-one."

"You really want to know?"

"Absolutely."

"You make everything sound so damn sexual. It's cute, your cluelessness, but it's going to get you in trouble one of these days."

"Y-You know that that isn't what I meant at all."

He really hoped Birkin knew by now.

Birkin leaned across the table slightly, eyes half-lidded and a smirk across his lips. "And yet, you always imply that you do mean it."

"I do not. When do I do that?" Issei asked, turning bright red. He didn't mean to. Really he didn't.

"Let's see..." Birkin licked his lips, staring across the table still. "Last time you were single, you were practically leaping at the opportunity to get a hold of me whenever you could. I remember a few Halloweens ago I asked you to kiss me for a joke, and you did, siting how frustrated you were that you couldn't remember our kiss during a virus. For starters."

"I remember that too, but - you asked. Anyone would be bothered that they couldn't remember something like that," Issei complained. "It's nothing special about you and me."

"You're so fulla shit." He leaned back and chuckled, taking a sip of his drink. "Lie to yourself all you want, at the end of the day, there's something special about you and I."

Issei sighed, looking away. "If you want to tell our boyfriends that, I've got my phone on me."

"You forget - I'm single these days. And I have no intention of splitting you and Lancer up; the community will do it for you soon enough I'm sure." Birkin? Bitter? Of course not, that's just crazy.

"You're right. But I reached a year with my last real boyfriend, maybe I'll be able to get that long again." A small smile. "If we're both still around when that time comes? Come be my rebound."

"That was the plan, yeah. Though it seems like you and I are kind of stuck in this weird place where we're never single at the same time, so nothing ever comes of it." A slight frown crossed his features as he thought for a few moments. "It's kind of weird how that always seems to happen."

"Maybe someone out there likes us better as star-crossed nonlovers," Issei suggested with a shrug. "It could happen."

"Kinda existential if you ask me. It's weird to think that there's someone out there keeping us from getting together just because they prefer us like this. ...Weird and really fucked up."

"On a more pressing note, shouldn't our waiter be here by now?"

"Maybe he's awkwardly avoiding us because it looked like I was about ready to fuck you into the table about ten minutes ago, and before that it looked like we were arguing."

Okay, now you've really gotten him to turn red, Birkin. "W-W-William! Don't say such things in public, when anyone could overhear you being lewd!"

Birkin practically busts a gut laughing at him. "You wouldn't be blushing if you didn't like that idea~"

"It's embarrassing you as- jerk."

He almost swore. Must be serious.

Birkin's laughter dies down to a few chuckles. "Oh will you calm down. I can't help how hilarious it is when you blush."

"Well, it's hardly my fault, either."

Issei huffs and crosses his arms.

"See? Like that, right there, is so incredibly adorable I can't stand it."

"You could stand it enough not to mock me, perhaps."

[RL with Birkin.]

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