[E-mail accidentally posted to his journal.]

[unknownrival]

To: kaitoukidforever@mail.yahoo.co.jp
From: ryudoji@mail.yahoo.co.jp
Subject: Photographs

Dear Kaitou Kid Fanclub:

I should have expected this, what with the way misinformation travels around here, but I was hoping you still had some sense.

First of all, those pictures you have in your possession. Notice the hair color? Notice how it isn't Kid's hair color? It's a costume party. Unless Kid would be one to have such a shoddy costume as merely a different hair color, you have to accept that it's someone else dressed up as him. I should know, because it's me.

This means that you do not have pictures of Kid fraternizing with Hakuba and Shirogane. You have pictures of a fan in costume fraternizing with the detectives. Therefore, stop claiming to have proof of - of relations between them. Kid wasn't even there! And I don't have relations with them either, and I was the one actually in those photographs!

In conclusion, the next person who says Kid did anything remotely resembling romantic at that party is wrong on so many levels, and I will find them and hunt them down. It's the least I can do for contributing to this mess.

-Ryudo Issei

((Of course the Gossip Girl story and the photos get back to the fanclub. Of course.))

Comments

[justaschoolgirl.livejournal.com]

Fraternizing uhm?

[stripping.livejournal.com]

That's the polite word for it and I'm not going to say anything on their other theories.

[justaschoolgirl.livejournal.com]

Oh what other theories?

[stripping.livejournal.com]

I just said I wasn't going to say anything!

[justaschoolgirl.livejournal.com]

But why not? Inquiring minds wants to know!

[anon foreva]

[pandorabox]

How do they get from hugging to 'a relationship?'

[stripping.livejournal.com]

I don't know! They're distorting the facts to fit their preconceived theories and it should be made a crime.

[pandorabox]

You'd have to arrest the entire fanbase if it was.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

You're saying that as if it would be a bad thing.

[pandorabox]

I do like most of my fans.

[100thbrokendish.livejournal.com]

People thought that?

[stripping.livejournal.com]

Something is clearly very wrong with them.

[100thbrokendish.livejournal.com]

I hope nobody believes them, then!

[stripping.livejournal.com]

Well, they are known to have wild and outlandish theories all of the time, so hopefully they won't be taken seriously.

[100thbrokendish.livejournal.com]

That's good, at least...

[truthinfortune.livejournal.com]

How about you hold them down, and I punch them in the face?

[stripping.livejournal.com]

That's a good plan. We'll do that.

[truthinfortune.livejournal.com]

After all, aren't most monks supposed to be pacifists? I don't think there's a rule against holding someone down so another person can hit them.

Although... I'll have to think of a different means of dealing with the girls. It goes against my nature to hit girls.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

It doesn't exactly follow the spirit of our beliefs, but obviously our belief system didn't account for people who truly need to be hit.

...Shirogane. 90% of the people speculating about Kid, Hakuba, and you are women.

[truthinfortune.livejournal.com]

Precisely!

...damn it all.

Well, I suppose that we could simply find another means of ruining their fun? Perhaps I could ask one of my hacker friends to crash the message board for a week?

[jagan-glare.livejournal.com]

It's a fan club. They live for stuff like this.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

But they should at least be able to distinguish their hero from someone in a costume! It's fine if they like the pictures because what they resemble, but there's no reason to mistake it for something that actually happened!

[jagan-glare.livejournal.com]

They should, but it's more fun to theorize and make up rumors.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

This is why I can't stand most fanclubs.

[jagan-glare.livejournal.com]

At least you can hope the letter gets through to at least one or two sane members.