[Video]

[unknownrival]

[Issei is shaking with the force of his sobs. He's obviously been crying for a while.

Eventually, the sobs slow down enough for him to get some words out in between them.]

That wasn't me. The person who hospitalized my father and brother, who drove the other monks to attack each other, who spoke to you all so cruelly - that wasn't me. I could never do such a thing to my family!

Why, wh-why did this happen? What did I possibly do to deserve anyone's ire enough for them to do this? Why did I fail my family and let this happen?! I should have resisted, I should have...

Father... R-Reikan-nii...

[And he bursts into a fresh wave of tears.]

Comments

AND HERE IS ONE THAT'S ON TIME.

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

Issei-san...

If healing is necessary, I can help.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

The hospital should take care of it. I have faith in them, I do.

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

You mustn't blame yourself.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

I should have been stronger and resisted more.

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

No. It is more difficult than that. It is far more difficult than that.

I know that it is difficult to forgive yourself not being strong enough to protect those you love, but you cannot blame yourself for something which you did not give yourself permission to do. You didn't do such a thing willingly. Regret will only eat away at you, it will do nothing to help.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

But I... My family is, because I was too weak... [He sobs again.]

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

[ISSEI STOP THAT SHE JUST WANTS TO GIVE YOU A HUG NOW]

Then you must take precautions from now on. You must train against such things with diligence!

I will not ask you not to cry, but... blaming yourself will only hurt you, more.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

[He needs huuuuugs.]

I will! Anything to keep those precious to me safe!

I can't help it.

tab is annoyingly close to capslock

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

[WILL IT BE A PROBLEM IF SHE COMES TO GIVE HIM A HUG D:]

Blaming yourself will only get in the way of what is necessary to overcome it.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

[He will freeze up and D: a little. Nothing personal, she's just a girl.]

I want to be stronger, I do... But it is partially my fault.

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

[WELL YOU KNOW WHAT TOO BAD it just got windy and you've now got a girl standing next to you :|]

No it is not.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

If I were stronger and more diligent, I could have stopped them! [He's still crying.]

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

[she puts a hand on issei's shoulder]

You did not expect such a terrible thing to happen. If you were to look at it that way, every problem that the world is faced with is your fault. It is difficult to overcome mind control. Nearly impossible.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

[He goes still, staring at the hand.]

I can't just say 'it was his fault' and go on with my life.

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

[lol sorry]

No, but you cannot waste precious time and energy believing that it was yours.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

Even if you say that, I... I still...

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

Issei-san! Do you think you will benefit from such actions and beliefs? Do you think that your family and friends will feel better seeing you in such pain, causing yourself such anguish over an occurrence that both was not your fault and cannot be changed? Do you honestly believe that anything positive can be accomplished by blaming yourself?

[stripping.livejournal.com]

If I don't feel guilty, I'll feel guilty for not feeling guilty and taking responsibility, misplaced as it may be. That's why I deserve to feel this way.

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

You do not deserve to feel this way. I know what it is like to regret, Issei-san, but I also know that my regret did nothing but cause the people dearest to me harm. I worried everyone I loved. You must overcome such thoughts!

[stripping.livejournal.com]

I can't! I'm not strong enough to even overcome this, let alone prevent anything like this from happening in the future- [He sobs again.] I can't do anything...

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

Your belief is your power. If you believe you cannot, you simply cannot.

But if you believe you can, I can try to help you.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

...Would you really be so kind as to help?

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

You are my friend. I will help any way I can.

[stripping.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Hououji. I am blessed to know one such as yourself.

[phoenix-temple.livejournal.com]

Would you, perhaps, like to see Cephiro once your family is better? I believe it would do you some good.