[Forward-dated to tomorrow because I'm in surgery okay I'm *allowed*]

[unknownrival]

[Failed filter away from Diarmuid]
I'd like to speak to someone with medical experience as soon as possible, please. It's somewhat important in the 'oh god oh god oh god' sense of important.

[Failed filter to Diarmuid]
You need to come back right now. I can't tell you this over the internet.

[False pregnancy virus to start us off! Look, it's tomorrow in Australia and I have surgery to do.]

Comments

[Lock - Video]

[material_guy]

Who'd be happy to hear their boyfriend is knocked up?

[Lock - Video]

[unknownrival]

He's a good father.

[Lock - Video]

[material_guy]

Come to think of it, Blue Lance said he had like five of 'em already... I guess he could adopt yours even if it ain't his.

[Lock - Video]

[unknownrival]

As far as anyone should be concerned, it's his.

[Lock - Video]

[material_guy]

Community's.

[Lock - Video]

[unknownrival]

Shut it.

[Lock - Video]

[material_guy]

If it even comes out, with his loyalty-to-loyalty complex, he'll adopt it no matter how much he don't want it, so why not call it like it is? It'll just make stuff even more complicated if you throw around lies like that.

[Lock - Video]

[unknownrival]

The community does not have DNA or genes to pass on.

[Lock - Video]

[material_guy]

And his got no way to mix with yours and make a kid. Every damned one of us guys on this place could play pass the cracker and it wouldn't make a baby.

Why're you figuring it'd take his if it's fuckin' with you? Hell, maybe it took a girl's genes or something, just to really screw shit up...

[Lock - Video]

[unknownrival]

Does it make such a difference to you?

[Lock - Video]

[material_guy]

Of course it does. It gets you worked up!

[Lock - Video]

[unknownrival]

Oh. Ha ha.

[Lock - Video]

[material_guy]

You're happy about this, ain't you?

[Lock - Video]

[unknownrival]

The baby?

...I think I am.

[Lock - Video]

[material_guy]

That explains it.

[Lock - Video]

[unknownrival]

I know it might only be a virus, but I'm happy.

[[Lock - Video]

[material_guy]

Listen, it's a virus. Just tell yourself it's a nightmare--and it is--and be a little miserable now so you can be happy when it's over. When it doesn't come out, you're gonna just get all depressed and shit, if you keep this up.

[Lock - Video]

[unknownrival]

There's nothing nightmarish about it. Other than the obvious physical problems, but still.